What life would be like if you knew your purpose

We can be desperate to find our purpose in life. That one thing in life that will light us up and motivate us to work hard and spread passion to many.

We look for it in a lot of places.

Purpose is the reason why something exists. So your purpose is why you exist.

The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren is a book I read when I was right out of college and single. Essentially it stated two things: I was created by God and for Him. We are made to love God and make Him known. That is an incredible purpose.

A lot of times people are looking for a purpose because they think that is what brings them value or worth. But we know that we are 100% valuable, worthy, and lovable not because of what we do. So truly understanding that, would mean that you know and believe, that nothing you do adds to or takes away from your value or worth. You are valuable and worthy just because you exist.

You don’t have to do anything to fulfill your purpose in life. You are already purposeful because you exist. There is NOTHING you can be, do, or have to be, to have more purpose or be more complete.

Your life will never be more valuable than someone else’s. That one is hard for me because I would like to believe that mine is more valuable. But that is absolutely not true. I will never be more valuable to God than someone else. And on the flip side, it blows my mind to think that my life has the same value as people like Mother Theresa and Bill Gates.

I love how God does that. He says you are ALL valuable, worthy, lovable to me. We just have to step into that and believe it moment by moment.

Philippians 2:13 states, “For it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.”

So since we know that we have purpose because we exist and we know that God is working in us to fulfill His purpose, then what are we supposed to do?

We get to choose what we want to do with our life simply because we want to. All living within the parameters of God’s Word, His commands and teachings, but you know what I mean.

You get to pick the reason you want to do it too.

This is what I am loving about God right now. How creative he is at fulfilling His purpose in the world by giving people desires and longings and passions. I know someone who is passionate about sharing Christ with international students who come to the United States for college. I know someone who is beyond talented at writing children’s books. I am watching someone loving and serving refugees that are resettled in Oklahoma. These people feel called to this but also are talented in these areas because God gave them the abilities to do this. But it all started with, I want to do that.

So what do you want to do, not because it makes you more… but you just want to? Is it start a ministry, is it lead a small group? Is it make and sell art, or crafts, or food?

Starting this business and serving single women has been incredible, but you know what is even more incredible, knowing that it doesn’t make me more…. I am just doing this because I want to. My worth and value has already been decided. God doesn’t need me to do this. He’s got you all covered. I know He planted that desire in my heart but I had to own it. I had to say, “I want to help single women who love Jesus, love this season of their life. I want to give them the tools I wish I would have had when I was their age. I want to help them avoid some of the suffering that I put myself through. I want to encourage and see them during this part of their story.”

If I am honest I just wanted to. I think I was born to be a life coach. It pulses through my veins. I love helping people and seeing them grow.

So what are you born to do? What is pulsing through your veins? What do you love to do, that God could have planted seeds of desire, passion, and capabilities in your heart that He wants you to follow.

Since you know your purpose, it is all just icing on the cake,

Angie

What would you do if you had more self-confidence?

A lot of women that I work with want to grow in this area.

I love sharing with them two definitions of self-confidence. One is to be secure in your self and your capabilities. Which as believers we know that God made us and gave us our abilities so really we would need to be confident in who God made us to be. And two is your ability to trust yourself, know that you can feel any feeling, and your overall opinion of yourself.

When we do things that we have done over and over we have confidence which is the thought, “I can do that.” But when we attempt to do something that we have never done before, then what do we do? We don’t have confidence to lean on. We think, “I have never done that,” and that typically creates doubt. So you would need self-confidence to do the things you have never done before. It would be your ability to do what you say you are going to do and trusting that you can feel any feeling that comes up in it.

Example: You want to try dating. You think, “I have never done this.” You want to doubt you are capable. But then self-confidence steps in and you think, “I am willing to feel any feeling and have my own back.” That would be self-confidence at work in your life. We know that going on a date may require you to feel a lot of feelings; awkward, uncomfortable, nervous, failure, vulnerable, and afraid. But being self-confident would allow you to do it anyways, knowing you can feel all the feelings.

I teach about this in the group program and help you understand that this is an area that you can grow in by doing some thought work in these areas.

Let’s break it down a little bit:

1. I know who God made me to be & the abilities He has given me

   This is a great place to start. Do you know how God has made you to be and the abilities that He has given you specifically? Each one of us is made so incredibly unique and He wants us to be confident in who He has made us. We didn’t create us by the way… He did. So spend some time thinking through who you are.

2. Your ability to trust yourself.

   This boils down to knowing you will do what you say you will do. You will follow through on your plan. People sometimes think that they are born with self-confidence or not. Really self-confidence is something you earn for yourself by keeping your word and doing what you say at the highest level. This may be an area that you need to practice. I share more about that process in this post.

3. You can experience any emotion

   A lot of times we live in doubt because we don’t think we can handle what could happen. But understanding that there is no emotion we can’t just feel all the way through in our bodies could be a game changer for you. I share more about that process in this post.

4. Your opinion of yourself

   Your thoughts about you are what generate or deplete self-confidence, so choose your thoughts about yourself wisely. A self-confident person knows they are capable, worthy, strong, and competent. This doesn’t have to be true in order to for you to think about it that way, you just have to practice feeling those feelings to gain more self-confidence. I share more about that process in this post.

   Understanding self-confidence has really helped me do things I have never done before. I have loved seeing what comes up for me and what feelings I actually feel when I do trust myself and lean into self-confidence. I have gone into a situation that was new and said out loud, “I can do this and feel any feeling.” It is so helpful because it gives me that BRING IT ON attitude.

   If you had more self-confidence what would you do? Would you start that new job? Go on that date? Take action towards your dream? Start living the life you have only dreamed was available to others?

   Here’s to practicing growing in this area,

   Angie Woods

The key to sticking to the schedule

Do you have a hard time doing what you say you are going to do?

Do you write something down in your schedule and your brain offers you this back, “No, you won’t”?

I see so many of my client’s having a hard time with this, they don’t trust themselves. They have begun to operate from a place of disbelief. They don’t honor their own commitments to themselves.

If they made a date with me they would keep it, but if they made a date with themselves they are quick to write it off as a bad idea, or change of plans. I especially see this with waking up, or having a quiet time.

So, if any of this resonates with you I want to offer you some tips and some new thoughts.

The first thing that has to happen, is for you to get really clear that you DO want to honor your commitments, no matter what. If you are going to say you are going to do something, you want to mean it. This will require you to think differently about you. You will need to begin to honor yourself and your decision making abilities. Thinking thoughts like, “I can make decisions that are important to me and I can honor them on a regular basis.” Begin with that thought and see how that feels. Does that work for you or do you need to find something closer to, “I am becoming someone that makes decisions and follows through.”

The next thing is to start practicing this. You have said so many times, “I don’t stick to my plans,” that we need to change that path in your brain. We need to go in and hack your brain and give it evidence that you do stick to your plans.

So, tonight before you go to bed I want you to write down on your planner or a sticky note one thing you are going to do and the time you are going to do it. Start small. Like pick something that you already do and it is easy for you. So if you are the queen of waking up at 7:45 even when you set your alarm for 6 then write down, “I will wake up at 7:45am” and then stick to that. You have to go in and build up that path in your brain that says, I stick to my commitments and then do just that. Each day, start deliberately exercising this by over and over creating a plan and sticking to it. You must practice this. Start small at the beginning, by just making a few commitments, and then after you get good at this, add in others that you want to start doing.

If you are wanting to wake up at 6 but you currently wake up at 7, start with “I wake up at 7,” and honor that. Then work backwards. I wake up at 6:55 and honor that. Keep on doing that until you are getting the results you want.

I have been implementing this with my schedule and training myself to write things down in my planner and I stick to them. When it says, “Laundry,” I just do it. No negotiation, no questioning if this is what I should really be doing. Just honoring that I made this decision and going with it. It is amazing the amount of wasted energy I was spending going back and forth on what I wanted/needed to be doing during a certain time slot. Before I go to bed each night I make my plan, and then the next day I honor it. I have been doing this with my food choices and even my workouts. I plan it the day before, when I am able to make decisions from my prefrontal cortex and not when I am in the moment from the lower brain. It has been amazing the results of truly learning to trust myself and honoring myself. It is so powerful what happens when you begin to treat yourself the way you would treat other people.

Listen, honoring yourself is NO JOKE. It is going to take intentional work to build this area up. Once you learn this skill of doing what you say you are going to do, you will be amazed at what is possible for you.

Can’t wait to see how this helps you,

Angie

P.S. If you don’t keep your commitment to yourself during this process, don’t bail on it completely. Be curious as to why you didn’t keep your commitment and see what your brain offers you. Open yourself up to learning from this and growing. We are all in process, but some of these tips may break down where you have been getting stuck before. Hang in there!

3 questions I ask myself every morning that help with productivity

I shared about having a morning routine last week. This has been very helpful to me because I was frustrated with how my mornings were going. I wasn’t waking up when I wanted to. I was struggling to get a quiet time in. I wanted to get a work-out in. I wanted to do so many things and I was never finding the time in my day because, life….

So, I started figuring out exactly what time I needed to go to bed in order to get up in the morning when I really wanted to. I wanted to have 2 hours in the morning to do what I wanted and I didn’t want to feel rushed. So, I wake up at 5am. Therefore I have to go to bed at 10pm. I can live off of 7 hours of sleep. Now, for some of you, this is not enough time, but figure out what you really need as far as sleep goes. I have a good friend who really needs 8-9 hours of sleep a night. No apologies, she isn’t lazy… she knows how much sleep her body requires. Don’t fight against it, work with it and honor it by really getting the sleep you need. Figure out how much sleep you need by tracking it. This is something that I see so many people neglecting. They try and force their body to cooperate with their schedule. So they sleep 5 or 6 hours and their body is tired, so they drink LOTS of coffee, so they can survive. But remember when we survive we live from our lower brain and seek pleasure, avoid pain, and try and be efficient in our old thoughts, and that pretty much keeps us in that stuck cycle. So knowing how much sleep you need is key to thriving.

I noticed that when I didn’t have a plan for what I wanted to do, I either kept hitting snooze or I wasted my time. I was on social media for an hour 😞, and then I was disappointed with myself.

So, I needed a plan. A way to maximize what I could, and wanted to do during that time. I came up with my what, and now I am super focused and LOVE my time. I wake up excited because I can’t wait to spend time with myself and God. One part of my time is cleaning up my mind. And during that time for the month of September I have been working on priorities and productivity. So to do that I ask myself 3 questions every morning and I write my answers down in my journal.

I thought I would pass this along to you so maybe you could try it out and improve your productivity as well. Here they are:

1. What did you get done yesterday? This isn’t a question I would have typically asked myself. I didn’t think it was important to look back. I tend to forget what I did and get lost in my big to do list for my current day. But this question allows me the opportunity to celebrate the steps I am taking each day to get closer to my goals but also allows me to really see what I can do in a day.

2. What 3 things are you focused on accomplishing for work and for home? This question constrains me to find the 3 most important things to do. I tend to have such a large list that I don’t get any of them done. In my confusion about what is important I might just do a little for each. But this pushes me to be laser focused. So, for today I know that I am finishing my blog and social media posts for the week, coaching for 3 hours. and setting up my emails for the week. For the home; I am grabbing groceries at Wal-Mart pickup and putting them away, figuring out our automatic tithing with our church, and making an intentional phone call to a friend.

3. How will I have to feel in order to get these things done? Typically I need to feel disciplined, or focused, or purposeful, or intentional. But today I chose inspired. I know that to write out a blog or social media posts, or emails I have to create the content from a place of inspiration. When I am inspired, I want to inspire others. So, I spent some time thinking about things that inspire me and it got me to think that my words might inspire you. I also want to feel honoring. When I honor my schedule I do it no matter what. So, even though I may have other things come up, I want to honor my schedule and call my friend that I made an intentional decision to call. I really like to feel accomplished at the end of the day and something that makes me feel that way is to know I followed my daily schedule.

From these questions I can focus my brain and give it direction. I can purposefully think thoughts that get me feeling inspired and honoring. I don’t waste brain space on what isn’t necessary or what distracts me. I am seeing such great results in my life in the productivity area of my life because I find I am actually following my schedule. I have a schedule, and I do what I say I am going to do.

These 3 questions have really helped me start my day very clear on what I want to do and what it will take to get them done. If you are someone who is wanting to be more productive or efficient with your time, try these 3 questions and answer them consistently for the rest of the month. You will be amazed at how this simple exercise can bring you clarity, focus, and discipline.

Here’s to doing what we say we are going to do,

Angie Woods

P.S. Sometimes when I don’t want to wake up at 5 I remind myself of how my future self will feel at the end of the day. The person that wakes up and starts my day off on the right foot. That person will feel amazing. You may need to have this thought in your tool belt too, as you try and wake up when your alarm goes off! The lower brain will throw a lot of good thoughts your way but you are ready with some powerful ones to combat that nonsense.

5 tips for figuring our your Fall schedule

Getting back into our Fall schedule has been a little adjustment. We are figuring out our new normal. I am working on how I want to feel about my time and how much I want to do everyday.

Last year at this time I didn't even know that I had a relationship with time? Isn't that crazy. My thoughts about time actually makeup my relationship with time. I think I like to fight it . I have some bad thoughts about time for sure! Do you?

We all have 24 hours in a day, and if most people sleep for 8, work for 8, then that leaves 8 other hours to do what we want with them. Those are the facts, 24 hours. I get to think about it however I want. The way it sounds is so simple, but I complicate it for sure.

I used to think about time from a very scarce mindset. Really believing I didn't have enough time, or I had too much to do. I bought into hustling and never stopping. At night my husband would sit and chill and watch Netflix, and all I did was stew and fuss about how much there was to do, and kill myself trying to do it ALL!

I became aware of this last August when I focused on how I felt about time and to be honest I think I have been a victim to time. I have been fighting the fact that there are "just" 24 hours in a day. God knew what He was doing by giving us limits and He decided 24 hours was more than enough. He also has put parameters on our life by making it so we need to sleep or rest to refuel for the next day. Someone asked me how much I rest in a day. I told them, "I don't rest, because if I do, I feel guilty that I am not getting more done with my time. My to-do list is too long to rest."

It really boiled down to believing I couldn’t rest because I was responsible for everything. Do you feel that way too? Like you are responsible for it all, and you have to make it all happen. Well, that will keep you from resting for sure. I really had to understand that I couldn’t do it all and that resting was good for me and needed and that the Sabbath and resting was meant for me by God as a reminder that He has it all. I just play a part, and a part which needs rest at times.

I also was fighting sticking to a schedule, because I didn't want to feel that I had to live by time constraints, yet I was constantly fighting with what time I did have.

I have changed my thinking about time to believe that I have more than enough time to do what God wants me to do every day. I know there will always be "more" to do, but I have done all I can today. I want to make a conscious effort to spend my 24 hours wisely. I want to look at each day as a blessing and opportunity, not another day to grind it all out. I want to believe that I can steward the 24 hours that God has given me well.

So, here are 5 tips for making your Fall schedule:

1. Be honest about what you have committed to this Fall and the time it will actually take. I now take an assessment of every one of my activities and give it a time amount that I am going to commit to. If I play recreation league volleyball, I am committing to 3 hours a week for games and travel time to and from the gym (don't forget the travel time).

2. Decide if you can do all of the things you have committed to. This is super important. I see so many clients say, "I have too much on my plate. I can't have a quiet time, workout, eat healthy, and work, and date, etc." Decide ahead of time, before saying yes to helping babysit, or leading another small group. What is on my plate this Fall and can I add anything or should I take anything away to have a healthy margin for rest in my life?

3. A big key is to plan your REST TIME first in your day. This is the part that blew my mind. When I know I am going to rest and relax, I work harder and smarter in my work time. When I know what I have scheduled to get done. I look forward to the rest time and when my brain wants to offer me a distraction of your tired or need to rest, I just remind it that I am resting at 8pm for 2 hours. It allows me to shorten the time I have to do something and constrain myself to focus on the task at hand. Before I had a never ending to do list and so I never thought I could rest. Now I know exactly what I want to accomplish that day and get it done so I can rest.

4. Schedule your hours by what results you will get accomplished in that time. So from 4-5 it is not work on business. It is, at 5pm I will have 3 blog posts written and 2 weeks of social media planned. Then I know what I have to do during that time and I don't just "work." I am focused and know that I have that to get done. You will see yourself being more productive with your time. I have seen some of my clients do this, they give themselves too long to do a task, and then they let the task drag on for too long. They end up wasting time instead of being focused and clear. Stop that by telling yourself how long something will take. The question always arises, "Angie, what if it takes longer than 5pm to get that all done" then you take finishing it out of your rest time. As you have to give up resting, you will begin to be ok with getting it done so you don't have to miss your rest time. I am learning how to do B- work rather than A+ work. It is allowing me an opportunity to become more efficient and I am getting more done. I don't sit at my desk and think what should I be doing now? I know exactly what needs done and I know what I have to do in that time period.

5. Figure out your morning routines and evening routines so you can get yourself in a rhythm. What do you want to do before you go into work and what do you want to do before you close up shop and head to bed? This has been very transformative for me because I now love my routines. And once you figure it out you just do it. And it is non-negotiable. I wake up and know exactly what I am doing to make the most of my 2 hours before my kiddos wake and the day unfolds. I know what needs to happen before I head to bed, and do it every night. I don’t waste brain energy by thinking should I do this, or should I do that. No, this is what you are doing, you decided ahead of time, now go!

These tips have really helped in my schedule this Fall and I know they will help you too!

Angie

The blameless spend their days under the Lord's care, and their inheritance will endure forever. Psalm 37:18